A Priceless Gift and Lesson

I am learning a priceless lesson. The “holiday season” has been difficult for me for a very long time….long before I ever considered retail. During my childhood my mother was trying to be the perfect mother by giving all five of us and many family friends a wonderful Christmas experience. My father, bless his heart, while generous in some ways, was very uptight each Christmas season as my mother spent too much money for his sensibilities.

Now many, many years later, after seven years of retail and various life events my discomfort has moved to new levels. If you know anything about retail you know that the “4th quarter is extremely important to the business. That means buying the Christmas ornaments, etc, by February (or missing the good ones) in significant quantities or come up short early in December. Then, at the July Gift Show buying extra merchandise and of course, the right merchandise, to be ready for the projected holiday increase in business. Then the many boxes of ornaments are delivered beginning in July to be checked, priced and organized. It is stressful for me as the ink goes from black to red…..a very normal thing for this time of the year in retail. Then, it is all artfully arranged (no small task!) in the shop thanks to two very creative visual magicians, while I provide support and back-up because display is not one of my talents.

This year’s holiday season has a new emotional twist. Last year, after spending another traditional Christmas Eve experience with my parents’ Best Friends and their children and grandchildren where “Marc” annually leads us in Christmas carols and serves us from his fabulous wine cellar. Sadly, Marc did not wake up last Christmas morning. Needless to say, this was a shock and great loss for his family and the many people who loved him dearly. He was an amazing man who will never be forgotten, the ideal father, husband, grandpa, friend, and peach of a guy!

Okay, that’s more than needed to be said, here’s my point. Thanks to a friend from high school, and by the way, a football star at that time, Joe Suppa and his wonderful wife Carol, have given me a new take on the concept of a “gift”. Joe is a talented sculptor (see his website at http://www.byjoesuppa.com) with an amazing life story some of which he shared with me yesterday. Unfortunately, we hadn’t had much contact for over 41 years except for class reunions that brought us together for brief, interesting, heartfelt discussions. Then, out of the blue about three weeks ago, I got an email saying that Joe wanted to give me a sculpture as a “gift”. At first I thought…what is the catch? Then I thought this may be my lesson - to “receive” with gratitude. In the email his wife asked me if there was an image that meant something to me so I mentioned the “lotus” flower and my interest in Eastern philosophies.

Yesterday I drove out to their home way out in the boonies near Scotts Mills and after at least 6 cell phone calls to Carol en route, I found their lovely handmade hilltop home. Their home and acres of landscaping are hand built by Joe… all of it a sculpture. Following a tour of his living room gallery of wood sculpture creations, he and Carol presented me with my piece. I was blown away by the beauty of the carefully crafted images, and the serenity of the gorgeous piece of carved dark hardwood. Carol had added the final touches of color to the flowers, lily pads, the colorful fish, the cherry blossoms, and the cranes all surrounding the woman in the center.

What can one say or do to thank someone for such a personal piece of art!?! We sat and talked for a while and I told Joe I had thought I should bring flowers or something to offer as a thank you but he said that my coming and our talk was his thanks. I know he meant it and I’m reeling with gratitude and appreciation that Joe and Carol have this “gift” concept clear.

I am sitting with this today trying to integrate the experience. “Thank You” is too trite to express what I’m getting from this lesson. But here it is, a heartfelt Thank you, Joe! for this powerful lesson and of course, the exquisite piece of art. This experience will forever challenge my uncomfortable feelings around this season and my attitudes about gifting. It may take awhile to have it settle in…Today things seem different. My thanks again to Joe and Carol for this incredible gift/experience/lesson.

Nancy